A drunken Nikki calls Kay from a bar in Mexico. Real-time, she’s grateful to be alive after various illnesses, getting sober and relapsing so many times. Nikki must deal with her MS and alcoholism (which she may have inherited from her Father or is maybe the result of addiction to pain medication) Flashback to Victor pouring vodka down the drain – then Jack lecturing her. Nikki credits those who love her for fighting when she couldn’t (tough love from Victor again) Nikki wants her grandchildren to know that they will never be alone. Flashback to Neil’s encouragement (especially poignant and sad considering the circumstances of his recent death) Sometimes a good Samaritan will reach out a hand – all you have to do is take it, Nikki muses.
Nikki can just imagine her grandkids scoffing at her corny advice – but if she didn’t have faith in the possibility each new day brings, she’s not sure how she’d deal with losses that seemed unbearable at the time. Flashback to an emotional Jack telling Nikki about a visit from the woman whose baby lived after receiving a heart transplant. He’s alive today because our son didn’t make it. Then, Nikki and Victor mourning the loss of Cassie. Being a parent involves such hard work, Nikki writes – even when that child is grown. Flashback to Vikki returning from Europe. Then Nikki warning Nick that Sharon’s after the Newman fortune (followed by a great catfight between Sharon and Nikki in the stables) Then, Nikki telling Victor that Billy makes Vikki happy. Nothing comes close to the joy of holding a baby (flashback to Nikki bringing Vikki home)
Nikki then writes about a parents’ need to protect their children at any cost; their lives are more important than your own. Flashback to her confessing to Victor that she killed JT. When your children have children of their own, your heart grows even more – that is life’s greatest gift.
When Kay died, Nikki was in shock. As she looks at photos of her dear friend in her scrapbook, she flashes back to unleashing her grief on Victor. I’m so lost! We weren’t finished. She was a best friend, Mother, confidante. Flashback to their first meeting. Kay did ‘live til she died’. Flashback to Kay counseling Nikki on how to seduce Victor with honesty. Catch him napping – attack when he’s asleep. Be more aggressive – there’s certain procedures (she thankfully lets the sentence trail off)…. Nikki can still hear Kay’s gravelly voice; wipe away your tears – never take loved ones for granted.
Nikki appreciates each and every one of her grandchildren and knows how blessed she is.
Flashback to a presumed-dead Victor shocking Nikki (as she whines at his gravesite) to announce that he’s alive and well. Shrieking ‘ I can’t believe it!’ she clings to him. Everything’s going to be alright, Victor reassures. He needed everyone to think him dead. Sit, he invites – I’ll explain the whole story.
In conclusion, Nikki hopes this letter brings her grandchildren closer to her. You are always in my heart, thoughts and prayers – all my love, Nikki. Eyes closed, she clutches the paper to her heart.